Musanze: Teen mothers ask for support to their parents

Some of teen mothers request the parents to support them instead of excluding them in the struggle time.

Some of teen mothers reside in Kinigi Sector-Musanze District, in the interview with mamedecine.rw, express their deep sorrow after having been sexually abused, sometimes raped and becoming pregnant, and then maltreated by their parent instead of helping them.

These teen mothers include girls under 18 years old, others are over but all had given birth while still under that age.

UMWARI (given name) 18 years old shares her experience of giving birth and being excluded by her parents.

“I gave birth at 15 years old. I was coming from school, I was approached and raped by a 28 years old man. When I discovered that I become pregnant, I had been afraid and keep silent. Finally, once my parent kept that information and I explain what happened. They refused to understand me, the conflict between us had been started and I decided to leave.” She said

NAKURE (given name), another teen mother says: “I am 17 years old, and I gave birth at 16 years old. I was in love with boy who impregnated me. My relationship with my parents is not good anymore, but there is some improvement.”

Florence NYIRARUGENDO, now 26 years old, gave a birth while still minor. She details the challenges she faced.

“I gave birth at 16 years old. It was very terrible with the struggles with my parents. After being pregnant, you enter in conflicts with your parent, sometimes you are forced to sleep outside. Now, my child is 10 years old. Once I learned how to use the sewing machine, I chose to live independently with my child.” She said

UWAMARIYA Josiane is a tailor. She shares her experience as a teen mother: “I’m 20 years old, I gave birth at 17 years old. My parents expelled me just after they knew I’m pregnant. I live with my child alone while I am being supposed to be with my parents.” She said

NYIRABENDA, a 65 years old elderly from Muhoza Sector-Musanze District confirms the fact that there are some teen mothers who face the violence from their parents due to the unwanted pregnancy.

“I know someone who faced the violence from her parents until she died together with her newborn. I understand that they used to beat her splinters. I advise the parents to keep patience in such situation.

Landouard GAKUBA, 30 years old, from Kinigi Sector-Musanze District is married. He informs mamedecine.rw that a lot of parents from Musanze District are used to harass their daughters when they get pregnant.

“She is no longer considered as significant, additionally, she is excluded from home.

These teen mothers are learning tailoring at Women Training Center supported by MUHISIMBI Voice of Youth in Conservation project created by HARERIMANA Emmanuel. He explains how the project started.

“I was raised in a harmful situation where my father leaved my mother alone. At school, MINALOC supported me among children living in poverty. After my studies, I asked myself what I can do to help others.” He said

“Based on how my mother took care for me alone, I was emotionally engaged. My choice went to the project of helping the teen mothers. At the beginning in 2017, I paid for them “Mituelle de Santé”, and gave them clothes and meal. After that, I thought to empower them.” He said

He added: “I bought 1 machine, 2 and now, we are able to receive 50 teen mothers per year. From 2017 with 5 teen mothers, the number increased. In 2021, they lent us the center called Future for Kids in which I was able to receive 50 teen mothers together with their children. Till now, we have 4 teen mothers rejected by their families. We pay the lent for them, feed them and help them to learn tailoring. From the beginning, 248 teen mothers were learned tailoring and after graduation, they received the sewing machine to help them.”

Emmanuel HARERIMANA has a request for the government: “We request the advocacy to especially for justice. These teen mothers were rejected, they faced abuse from their family as well as in the whole society. Wi wish the government to set the campaign intended to inform all Rwandan population to take care for children, to fight the violence against children rather to support them.”

Françoise UWIZEYE, a Psychologist at Kibagabaga Hospital, details some of the consequences faced by the teen mothers as well as their parents.

“Teen mother may face a lot of consequences like trauma due to the lack of her expected future, the wrongdoings for her especially when she got pregnant by being raped, she can be affected by depression due to the harm situation, anxiety, hopelessness, persistent overthinking often about unresolved issues. All these may affect the teen mother at the same time or she may face one among them.” she said

She added: “The parents also face the trauma due to the loss of the future the envisioned for their child. Also they feel ashamed due to their child’s disobedience, and worry that the neighbors perceive them lack of responsibilities. For these, parents face depressive mood accompanied by emotional agitation which cause the conflicts between them and the child.”

Françoise UWIZEYE concludes by advising both children and the parents: “Children who have not face this issues yet must obey their parents. The parents also have to try to meet their responsibilities including to be closed to their children. For those who have the children gave birth and rejected them, it is better to support them during the terrible situation they live, to listen to them and help them to heal their wounds. These will bring the children the hope of bitter future.” She said

Sylvanie GASOROMANTEJA, who is in charge of gender and family promotion in Musanze District declares that they every time meet those teen mothers and help them about the issues happened.

“We are closed with those children; we encourage them to go to ISANGE for special help. Today, we have a challenge of some among them who refuses to tell the truth about who impregnated them. This challenge is the one which hinder to get justice.” She said

She added: “According to the parents who expelled them from the home, sometimes this caused by the under mindset. Some of the parents paid school fees and hope a bitter future for their children and be surprised when she gets pregnant. This issue creates the conflicts between them. In collaboration with MUHISIMBI, we have the consistence discussions with them and ty to link them. It’s a log journey. In one year, 60 teen mothers were reconciled with their parents.”

The National Institute of Statistics (NISR) in its report from Rwanda 5th Population and Housing Census, shows that countrywide, there are 10,562 female children aged 10-17 who have given birth. Among the 17 years olds, 4094 girls have given birth, slightly over 1.34 %.

Fulgencie MUKAMUSONI